So you’ve decided to set up a uk dating profile online... (If you haven't, what are you waiting for?) What Happens now? Sit back and wait for the emails to flow in, or search for someone, the choice is yours. Whatever you choose to do, here are a few practical guidelines to think about.
Flirting and dating on-line is no different to doing it off-line, just a lot safer and easier if you do it right. Most of the 'rules' are common sense. Your mother was most probably right - you just don't have to admit it.
Creating The Right Impression
Make sure your profile is not misleading. Give the wrong idea and you'll be sure to get the wrong response or no responses at all.
Think About What You Say
So, you've spotted a singleton that you want to contact online. But what do you say? It's important to try and make the right impression when first making contact online, as you may only get once chance to get it right!
• Be Clear - Words and phrases can be interpreted in many different ways, so when drafting your message try and be as clear as you can to avoid any misinterpretation.
• Be Concise - Don't attempt to write a long winded message that needs its own chapters, a few well written sentences is enough to make an initial introduction.
• Ask Questions - A couple of questions before signing off gives the recipient more of an incentive to respond to you, and also gives them something to talk to you about in their response.
• Keep Momentum - Once initial contact has been made, its vital to keep momentum going, keep asking questions and find out things you have in common to keep conversation flowing.
• Be Friendly and Polite - Cracking bad jokes, excessive swearing, or voicing strong and possibly controversial opinions may not get you off onto the right foot.
• Be Positive - There is nothing worse than a singleton droning on about negative experiences, be it in relationships or other aspects of their life. You may risk sounding negative, depressive, or negative which isn't appealing.
Personal Details
The greatest thing about being online is the safety and privacy it affords you. Just be careful! When you start corresponding with people don't give out your personal details too early. Build up a sense of mutual trust first. Keep your last name, telephone number, email address, place of work and exact family details private until you are ready to share them.
Don't be Pushed
Watch out for people pressing you for your personal details too early and too often. Also, hang back on meeting off-line until you are ready.
Inconsistencies
keep an eye out for changes in content and style in the messages you receive. If Mr Loving Kindness suddenly starts sounding like Carlos the Jackal on testosterone it may be an idea to back off or move on.
Dating Scams what can I do to protect myself?
• only use a reputable online dating or chat service and follow the basic safety tips for online dating
• be sceptical and ask yourself simple questions like, 'why am I the only person who can help them but I have just met them?'
• test your date - ask them lots of questions, try to phone them or post them something or possibly suggest meeting them. If all attempts fail, you are probably dealing with a scammer.
Meeting Off-Line
This is the big one! You mailed each other, chatted and are ready to take the plunge and meet for real. Whilst taking your brother from the commandos with you may ensure your safety, chances are your date may get nervous, or prefer him to you!
Make your first few meetings in public places, ideally at lunchtime if you can. If you have a mobile phone takes it with you and possibly take a pre-arranged call. Tell someone where you are going and try to have plans for after your date - don't be caught out with "so what are you doing after dinner?". Have your answer ready. Don't give out your home or work address and don't give in to pressure.
One of the best places to meet someone for the first time is in a city or town centre coffee shop. Tell the person you are meeting at the outset that you only have half an hour to spare, and then if things are not going well or you feel uncomfortable with them, you can make your excuses without causing any offence. If you are both getting on fine, then you can just extend the "half hour" for as long as you wish.
And guys, all this applies to you too. The chances of being taken for a ride by women may be less, but don't discount it.
Most importantly, relax, have fun and keep things safe.
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
Online Dating : Safety Tips for Men
Almost everything you read about online dating safety is directed at women but men need to be concerned as well. Perverts, sexual predators and weirdoes come in both sexes, all sizes, and all ages…as do, liars and cheaters. So men need to stay on guard, too.
It is common knowledge not to readily give out personal information to strangers. The reason for not doing so is as large as the number of strangers who want that information. If you come across a person who is giving out personal information and asking others to do the same, don’t do it. You don’t know what they want to use it for….and you had better believe they want to use it for something. That “something” will not be for your benefit. Men, also, need to guard their real names, addresses, phone numbers, and place of employment. Do not give that information to anyone online until you are confident that they are who they say they are.
Men, be wary of women who seem too financially needy. If they ask for money, in any of a dozen ways women can ask for money, cut the relationship off immediately. They are not looking for love or even friendship….they are looking for financial help.
If a woman gives you a contact number but you cannot ever reach her at that number, beware. If you always have to page them or text them and have them call you back, this could be a sign that what they are telling you is not the complete truth.
A need to get married and insecurity are other signs men should be very wary of. If the woman is pushing too hard for a commitment you aren’t ready to make, it might be a good time to head for the nearest exit.
It is common knowledge not to readily give out personal information to strangers. The reason for not doing so is as large as the number of strangers who want that information. If you come across a person who is giving out personal information and asking others to do the same, don’t do it. You don’t know what they want to use it for….and you had better believe they want to use it for something. That “something” will not be for your benefit. Men, also, need to guard their real names, addresses, phone numbers, and place of employment. Do not give that information to anyone online until you are confident that they are who they say they are.
Men, be wary of women who seem too financially needy. If they ask for money, in any of a dozen ways women can ask for money, cut the relationship off immediately. They are not looking for love or even friendship….they are looking for financial help.
If a woman gives you a contact number but you cannot ever reach her at that number, beware. If you always have to page them or text them and have them call you back, this could be a sign that what they are telling you is not the complete truth.
A need to get married and insecurity are other signs men should be very wary of. If the woman is pushing too hard for a commitment you aren’t ready to make, it might be a good time to head for the nearest exit.
Monday, September 20, 2010
Setting the Mood with Your Date
Nothing makes a more romantic gesture than one that is made exclusively for the sake of romance itself. When it comes to seducing a woman if you want to make a really big impression on us, then you'll want to pull out all the stops and create a romantic date without waiting for a special occasion. Not to mention that there is no rule that says you have to wait for a certain day or time.
This advice is particularly necessary to know a little about your wife and what she likes and dislikes. But you do not have to know like the palm of your hand to make a truly romantic evening for two of you to share. The most important thing is to consider what you know is romantic and then do everything possible to create that for her. The very fact that they thought of her and loved her romance anything really impress and make you feel very special.
Many of these suggestions would have relatively little time for preparation. Remember, it is sometimes the smallest gesture that really make a woman feel special. The first is a romantic candlelit picnic in a park or other quiet area. This is sure to make your woman feel special. No special occasion is necessary. This is also easy to put together with a bottle of wine, some cheese, strawberries, despite the two of you like.
If you have a portable CD player you can put that together with a disc of romantic music and have a night when the both of you are sure to remember. But do not forget check the weather and make sure to bring a blanket!
The next suggestion I have is good for any weather, a nice meal by candlelight made up their favorite foods and dessert instead. When you're planning this evening be sure to have soft music, romantic and a good bottle of wine. Her favorite flowers would be a nice extra touch. This meal can be prepared by you or ordered and picked up a restaurant.
As long as I have been careful to choose what you like is sure to be a great success! If your place tends to be a bit messy, be sure to take some more time to clean to avoid tripping over your tennis shoes or gym bag.
This advice is particularly necessary to know a little about your wife and what she likes and dislikes. But you do not have to know like the palm of your hand to make a truly romantic evening for two of you to share. The most important thing is to consider what you know is romantic and then do everything possible to create that for her. The very fact that they thought of her and loved her romance anything really impress and make you feel very special.
Many of these suggestions would have relatively little time for preparation. Remember, it is sometimes the smallest gesture that really make a woman feel special. The first is a romantic candlelit picnic in a park or other quiet area. This is sure to make your woman feel special. No special occasion is necessary. This is also easy to put together with a bottle of wine, some cheese, strawberries, despite the two of you like.
If you have a portable CD player you can put that together with a disc of romantic music and have a night when the both of you are sure to remember. But do not forget check the weather and make sure to bring a blanket!
The next suggestion I have is good for any weather, a nice meal by candlelight made up their favorite foods and dessert instead. When you're planning this evening be sure to have soft music, romantic and a good bottle of wine. Her favorite flowers would be a nice extra touch. This meal can be prepared by you or ordered and picked up a restaurant.
As long as I have been careful to choose what you like is sure to be a great success! If your place tends to be a bit messy, be sure to take some more time to clean to avoid tripping over your tennis shoes or gym bag.
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