Why Orgasms Matter!

Neil Strauss (Style) was down at the Mystery Method convention in Las Vegas a week or so ago, and had a question from an audience member.

His question was: "I can't seem to get a steady girlfriend, whats the problem?"

Neil question: "Is she having regular orgasms?"

The importance of this is profound.

Women will go elsewhere if their not receiving pleasure from you. If you don't know how... you need to learn. Much like the game of seduction / attraction, we all started from scratch in many cases.

Neil theorized that the major reason why women leave men, is that they aren't being sexually statisfied and that contributes to a total lack of attraction.

From ABC News recently:

"A recent study concluded that almost half the adult women in America are not happy with their sex lives and they don't know why. Many are too embarrassed to talk about it with their partners, or to get help.

But more and more women are finally beginning to admit to an awful feeling they've avoided discussing. Sex isn't enjoyable for them."

Women need orgasms!!

So...

If you need help in this area, a brand new manual "Secrets of Orgasms" just got released that could give you the help you need. Get that woman addicted to you!

Like Mystery says: "One funny joke from a comedian and IT'S funny, three or more and HE's funny." Same with sex.

Get pleasure from giving pleasure!

Openers for All "Situations"

Hey guys,

Joseph Matthews here. I want to share a story with you all that I thought was interesting.

Friday night, I was out with a friend of mine clubbing. As we were walking from one club to another, we saw two women walking together in front of us.

These women were HOT!

So hot, in fact, that every guy they passed by on the sidewalk tried to talk to them. How did they try this? By saying things like:

"Hey, where you going?"

"Damn, you fine!"

"Hey, come back here, baby!"

Needless to say, these girls were completely ignoring each and every guy who talked to them.

It's a harsh reality that most girls who are as hot as these two were get approached by men ALL THE TIME, and have heard every stupid line in the book. In fact, they get approached so much, that they don't even respond anymore. They're just focused on getting to where they're going.

So of course, upon seeing this, I thought to myself "How would I approach these girls?"

The answer was pretty self-evident. In fact, it was staring me right in the face!

The situation was dictating what I should say to them.

"Oh my god! Every single guy is trying to pick you guys up! How annoying is that? You guys need to hire BODYGUARDS just to keep all these horny waldos at bay!"

This is an example of a SITUATIONAL OPENER.

Situational Openers can be the best way to meet a woman if they are done right. This is because this type of Opener is UNIQUE to the interaction you are having with the woman.

Not only that, but it shows you guys have a common understanding of the reality you are mutually experiencing. And that, my friends, creates a connection between the two of you.

It's like knowing the punchline to a joke most others have no clue about.

And more importantly, this is one of my most favorite kind of situational opener, namely, the "Crash and Burn" opener.

This is a situational opener where you capitalize on other men's failures, while conveying the illusion that you are different from the other guys and are not looking to get into the woman's pants (even though the truth may be VASTLY different from that which you are conveying).

For example, anytime you are in a situation where there are women you want to approach, and you see a guy go up to them and try to hit on them, this gives you the chance to use the "Crash and Burn" opener.

Simply walk up to the girl, and comment on what the other guy did wrong.

Saying things like:

"So, how'd he do?"

or

"Did it hurt? He was hitting on you pretty hard. Did it hurt?"

Or anything along those lines will open up your target for conversation. These types of "Crash and Burn" openers work great in high stimulus environments where girls are being hit on (like bars and clubs, for example).

So next time you see some poor schmoe strike out, be sure to take the opportunity to capitalize on it!

You can find out more about the "Crash and Burn" Opener, along with other Situational Openers in my ebook, "The Art of Approaching: How to meet ANY Woman, ANY Time, ANY Where you may be."

You can download the ebook right now at:

Art of Approaching Link

Until next time!

Your friend,

Joseph Matthews

The Power Of Negs

Last night, I was ran a set on HB7.8, really cute girl with a European feel. A fitness freak. We picked her up (her and her friend), and decided to hit up some dance parties. We wanted to have social proof by having somewhat decent girls around.

This girl is a really cool girl, she responded kind of distant to the conversation but after a DHV stories, and photo routine she got a little warmer. Then after one of the stories about making animal noises while making out (a true story that's a complete FREAKSHOW) I negged her, and said "She'd probably love it!" Then like Mystery says, "Throw and Go" so I continued on, just to have continuation in the set.

She got way pissed!

The neg was successful.

This is the gauge of a good neg. Women will look at you like, "WTF" then if you continue like it wasn't a big deal. Success. Don't ever linger for a reaction, that's key to a neg.

I could tell because of the sexual tension in the car. Then 10 minutes later, after more light banter she asked, "Donovan, can I get your phone number?"

This is the first time that's EVER happened to me, so I was taken back, so I said, "Yeah, I'll give it to you a little later".

We had a great time dancing at the parties. Definitely meet up with her again soon.

Just remember guys, that negs must be "throw and go". You can never wait for a response or care what she says in return. In fact, don't even give her a chance to respond. The cocky and funny techniques and negs all work to DHV and lower her perceived value.

Negs work great.

Some example negs:

Man, how do you guys hang with this chick? You can dress her up but you can't take her out huh?!

I think I loved you *pause* before you turned out to be such a freak. (smile)

Video About Negs Being Bad

Getting The Phone Number, Mystery's View

At Mystery's kick ass seminar down in Vegas this weekend, my buddy asked the main man about getting women's phone numbers at the mall.

He asked for how long should rapport be being established before he gets the phone number to time bridge.

Mystery said that it's probably better not to time bridge but bounce. (Move to another location) Like, "I want some ice cream, come with and get some with me down here..."

Although if you MUST time bridge, then Mystery recommended a minimum 25 minutes, preferably 40 minutes. Mystery elaborated and told us that in his personal experiences, this has been the best situation no matter the woman.

This means that you would be in FIRM A3 before getting a number or email for it not to flake out.

Looking back, I've seen this to be totally true in my dating life. Another point for Mystery. The sick genius.

I was also looking on the Bedroom Blogger, a Cosmopolitan published blog about a woman in the real world, apparently...

"Hey John," I asked, since he'd been so quick to offer his advice on the
Jane situation. "Why would a guy hit on a girl, ask her for her number and then
not call?"

I know, I know. I'm should let go of the Dr. McDreamy thing.

"He probably has a girlfriend," he said. "He thought you were hot and
wanted to hang out with you and flirt. He probably just asked for your number
because it would have seemed weird if he didn't. Even though he wasn't planning
on calling."

Hmmm. John-With-The-Baseball-Hat is a wealth of useful guy information.
On the way out, Jenna and I discussed him.

"You know," she said. "I don't want to terrorize anyone but
John."

"Me neither."

"I do believe we have ourselves a cooking class boyfriend."

"And maybe a boyfriend for Jane."

Ok, I don't know about you blokes but if I ever get a phone number from a woman, I always call her.

Otherwise, I wouldn't get it. There has to be a better reason other than, I've got a girlfriend. Good advice dickhead, and what a effing eye opener to woman... please. I'm never reading that blog again, well... maybe to rag on it.

Killer Techniques To Overcome Anxiety When Approaching Women

I loved Cedar's post on Mystery's forum about approach anxiety and dealing with it properly. If some of these terms seem foreign to you, read Mystery's e-book for a heads up.

Anxiety

Anxiety is a defense mechanism. It exists to protect you from abnormal behaviour. Consider a high steel worker. These guys stand on two foot wide beams hundreds of feet off the ground. They're strapped in, but their body doesn't understand that. The first few weeks are hell.

After that, it's no big deal. Heights don't bother them. Their body has accepted heights as a feature of the environment. It's normal to THAT person. Buddy of mine worked high steel a decade ago. Said the heights were nothing to him at the time.

But he's afraid of heights now. Because HIS ENVIRONMENT CHANGED. He doesn't work high steel. He's not SURROUNDED by his anxiety any more. To him, heights are ABNORMAL now, when they were NORMAL a decade ago.

Approach anxiety is a collection of anxieties. Fear of talking to strangers. Fear of interrupting people. Fear of running out of things to say. Fear of looking dumb (social pressure). And fear of success (a personal favorite).

Talking to Strangers

Talking to strangers is the most common. In our hunter/gatherer days, this kind of behaviour could get you killed. We don't live in a tribal society any more, but our bodies doesn't understand that. Our biological programming is from the olden days.

If you do not talk to new people EVERY DAY, how do you expect to sarge at the bar? You're body will fight you. It will protect you. Unless you acclimate it.

I picked up a pamphlet on breaking habits on the trip to Vegas. It takes 21 days to form or break a habit. If that's true (and it sounds about right), it takes three weeks to overcome approach anxiety. By talking to strangers EVERYWHERE.

That means on the bus, at the gas station, line at the coffee shop, airplanes, work, restaurants, etc. Talk to a new person EVERY DAY. Use a stock opener on them. Like maury povich or dental floss.

Understand that if you STOP being a social creature for any length of time, approach anxiety WILL RETURN.

If lunch-time street approaches are an option, take a walk on your lunch break and open 3 sets. Open and eject if you're not up to stacking material. This will make bar sarges WAY easier. It'll slowly remove the anxiety of talking to strangers.

Fear of Interrupting People

Personal Skeleton. We are raised from birth to be polite. To be considerate of other's feelings, opinion and pasttimes. We are a sensitive society. We're also a wussy society. The alpha man DOES take others into consideration. But he doesn't hesitate to give people the gift of his or her reality.

Why are you worried about interrupting people? Switch places with your target. If you were talking to friends and a supermodel in lingerie interrupted you, would you be pissed? Fuck no. I don't care if I was about to solve world piece.

Women are ALWAYS receptive to their knight in shining armour. Walk in, be the cool guy, and don't care about their conversation. Hell, tease them about it. After you reach the hook point apologize for interrupting and offer to leave. They'll drag you back.

These people lead boring lives. They wake up in their boring bed, they drive to a boring job in their boring car and they hang with their boring friends and talk about how bored they are.

You're not interrupting ANYTHING IMPORTANT. Not at a bar, not on the bus and not in the casino. It's your reality. Everyone else is along for the ride.

Fear Of Running Out Of Things To Say

I hear a lot of people saying 'I hate routines, I just want to talk normal.' Here's the thing. You're not getting laid. Why would you talk normal. Use the damn routines until 'normal' to you is 'attractive' to women.

Routines are normal conversation from someone else. Someone good with women. You're wearing the skin of successful PUAs until you develop your own.

This is why MM focuses on routines. Memorize stock routines from the MM forum, the lounge and bristol lair. After your newbie mission, rotate in personal DHV stories and field test them. You'll have dozens of things to say.

And don't worry about forgetting what to say. It continues to amaze me how, out of nowhere, a routine I haven't used in six months drops into my head in set. Listen to your instincts on this one. If you're in set and a routine comes to mind, USE IT.

Fear Of Looking Dumb

Tylder Durden refers to this phenomenon as social pressure. Women are more sensitive to this than guys are. Your body is protecting you from being outside of the norm. Being normal and boring is SAFE. Being Alpha is DANGEROUS. You are CONSTANTLY being fucked with. You are CONSTANTLY proving yourself by reacting to shit tests, amogs, cock blocks, etc.

How do you deal with it? If you're comfortable in your own skin, then you have nothing to fear. So what if your top hat looks funny. You like it. You don't care if anyone else does. Your mindset is apathy. It's your reality.

Hell, you're trying to figure out why everyone's wearing polo shirts and khakis. Looks ridiculous. Far as you're concerned, they should ALL be wearing top hats. 'Cause then you can wear khakis and stand out.

Fear Of Success

Another personal skeleton. I'm a busy guy. So's my wife. She works part time on weekends and evenings. My son has a martial arts class a few nights a week. If I hit the bar this Thursday and timebridge a girl, I don't have much of a window in which to see her.

I'm close to closing an LTR for me and the wife. She'll take a chunk of our time. What if I find a second one at the bar? When will I have time for a Day 2 or for anything more long term? Where will I find time for all these girls?

Easy. DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT. What a lame fucking excuese NOT to approach. I won't talk to a girl because there's a 1% chance she might become my girlfriend? Focus on the process.

You don't have to timebridge the girl. And even if she's your thing, there's a good chance you'll fuck it up. I've met hundreds of women. And a dozen of those were completely my type. Totally compatible.

Am I upset I couldn't close them? A little. But I keep finding more. 2000 women turn 21 (or any other age) EVERY DAY in this country. Don't worry about fucking it up with one girl. Focus on learning from that girl so you don't fuck up the next one.

This kind of anxiety is all about outcome dependance. Don't worry about where the sarge goes. Worry about how well you sarge. Doesn't matter if you get a bullseye on the shooting range once in a while. Make it happen EVERY time.

Experience

The best answer I have to Approach Anxiety is to remember all the fun times you had after you ignored it. After a few good sets, you'll think back to your favorite right before you open your first set of the night. And bam, with good memories comes good energy.

Example. I don't AMOG. Not my style. But my wing pointed out this AFC leaning in on a two set. Girls were turning away. It was over. And then I noticed an empty space between the AFC and one of the girls.

I took it.

And talked to the guy. Girls were never more cofused in their life. Chatted up the guy who wasn't sure what I was doing but knew he shouldn't freak out.

Then I turned and used the patented Cedar opener on the girls. 'Hey.' With a head nod. Her reply? 'espanol?' I about died. I AMOGed a spanish speaking set. I was cracking up. Got a thumb wrestle out of the target, which got her laughing. I coached the guy what he did wrong and watched him number close her two minutes later.

I'm smiling just thinking about it. And damn straight I'm gonna try and take another set this week. That was too much friggin fun not to do again.

Same thing with approaches. You have some good sarges and the approach anxiety gets less and less of a barrier. You'll have too many positive memories and emotions tied up with sarging. No way approach anxiety will hold you back.

Avoidance

If you don't get over approach anxiety, you'll never overcome A1. Without A1, you can't reach A2. Or C1. Or S-anything, right?

There's ways around A1. Winging, approach invitation and hot game for examples. These techniques aren't solid game. They're flukes. They work, but they hinder your game. You become reliant on a tactic that opens maybe 3 sets in the bar. You can't open the entire room. Don't use these to circumvent your approach anxiety.

There might be some validity to using these in an attempt to develop good feelings in sets, but you become dependant on these techniques VERY quickly. Don't fall into that trap. Make your own reality. Conquer this fear and open some fucking sets.

Party on. And happy hunting.

Real Social Dynamics Openers?

On the lighter side...

I was reading Thundercat's blog and found this comment to make my day funnier for those who know PUA lingo... by JaredP

"thank god we have Real Social Dynamics to tell us what to do. here are socially proofed RSD instructors demonstrating lollipop opener on celebrity HB9"





lol

How To Meet A Woman When She's With Her Friends

***AN EMAIL FROM A GUY LOOKING FOR HELP***

Hey Mr. Matthews,

I like your e mails a lot but there is one unusual problem with me. I like a girl in my chemistry class but the problem with her is that she only comes and goes in the class and always has her best friend (she's a girl) with her. They Both are always GLUED together so it makes very difficult for me to approach her and talk to her.

I tried a lot of times to approach her, after some time they both start talking and I just sit staring at them.

There is only one month left for this semester to end and after that I will loose her if I dont do anything but what can I do????????

I have asked many people and tried many things but nothing seems to work. I just dont know what to do??????

--A Frustrated Student

***MY RESPONSE***

Take heart, Frustrated Student, class is in session!

I, and many other men, have been in similar situations many, many times.

Let me make one thing clear right now that you must understand before you go out trying to meet women:

WOMEN OF BEAUTY ARE NEVER ALONE!!!!!

You heard me right. Pretty girls have a very high social status. They are almost always surrounded by people, be they girlfriends, boyfriends, male "nice guy" friends, brothers, sisters, parents - whatever! They will always be in groups of people.

It is very rare to see beautiful women alone. And when they are alone, they're usually waiting for someone!

The common term I refer to people who like to hang around with beautiful women is: OBSTACLES.

If you imagine you're on a race track, and at the end of the track is this girl you want to meet, all the rocks, hurdles, holes, and booby traps between you and her are OBSTACLES that can ruin your chances of meeting her.

But there is a way to navigate that minefield and avoid all these obstacles! That way is called:

GROUP THEORY.

Group theory is a system by which you actually address the girl's friends instead of trying to ignore them. Through group theory, you win over the girls peer group and turn them into YOUR support group.

Here's how it works...

The girl you want to meet is always with her friend, right? And you're worried that you can't approach the girl you like because the friend will interfere in some way.

So what you do is forget about the girl you like, and approach her friend first!

That's right...

YOU FORGET ABOUT THE GIRL YOU LIKE AND APPROACH HER FRIEND FIRST!

Now, this doesn't mean you're going to try and pick-up the obstacle instead of the girl you really like. It just means you're going to overcome that obstacle before you reach for your prize!

Remember: You must disarm a land mine before you step on it!

You do this by acting disinterested in the girl you're really interested in, and focus on winning over the girl you don't really care for!

Then, once you've won over the obstacle, you ask if you can "borrow" her friend for a minute because you've been neglecting her. Once her friend gives you approval to talk to her alone, guess what? You've just gotten her STAMP of approval!

This means that the girl you like has no reason NOT to talk to you! Then, you pull her off to the side, and work your magic one-on-one.

I talk more about group theory and various other tactics on meeting women in my book The Art Of Approaching: How To Meet Any Woman, Any Time, Anywhere You May Be! In it, I go in-depth on how to meet women and overcome any and all obstacles that may be in your path.

If you want to have the skills to meet beutiful women no matter what, click below now:

Click Here

Don't wait. If you never get conrtol over this aspect of your life, you will be DOOMED to a life of quiet desperation, seeing opportunity after opportunity with women you like pass you by!

Wishing you success with women,

Joseph Matthews