Mystery Method (4): Qualification

UPDATE! Do you want to get Mystery to teach you every step of the way? Check out his DVD Home Course.

LEARN THE MYSTERY METHOD

ATTRACT 1:
Opening

ATTRACT 2:
Female-to-male attract phase (often called "attracting")

ATTRACT 3:
Male-to-female attract phase (or "qualifying")

COMFORT 1:
Connection

COMFORT 2:
Trust

COMFORT 3:
Intimacy

SEDUCTION 1:
Arousal

SEDUCTION 2:
Last-minute Resistance

SEDUCTION 3:
Sex

A3: Qualification is often called "Male to Female Interest". It is the inverse of A2: Attraction. By the time we've gotten to Qualification, we have already opened (A1) and made our target woman interested/attracted in us (A2). Now, and not before, we can express interest in her. As Mystery said, "the amateur will hit on a woman right away. We wait 8 minutes."

Expressing interest in a woman isn't as easy as it sounds. Some cardinal rules:
Stay away from expressing interest in her based on her looks. An attractive woman has heard it before. A less attractive woman won't believe you. Besides, "complimenting her looks" is the same boring tactic that every other guy uses. Find another reason that she has "won you over".

Use the qualification process as an opportunity to convey even more value and establish a genuine connection. Put yourself in a woman's shoes and ask yourself how you would choose between 2 guys. Guy A who tells you he likes you because you have a nice body or Guy B who tells you he likes you because you have great energy, you both love opera, and share the love of mountain biking? It works for guys too. Which woman would you choose? Woman A who says: "you're rich -- I love that" or Woman B:"you're fascinating -- I love that"?

Make her work for it. Seduction is a game and women want to play too. Don't take away her fun of seducing you. Also keep in mind that if she is able to win you over too quickly she will think that you don't have a lot of options, that you are not very choosy, or that she is of a higher quality than most women you meet. If she believes any of those things, you are no longer "the prize". You can get some women without being "the prize" but not the most desirable ones.

This all adds up to the fact that you have to make the woman attract you. Just as you spend A2 (Attract) attracting her, now you have to let her win you over.

That sounds easy, and the problem here probably isn't what you are expecting. The problem is that most women are terrible at attracting men using anything other than their looks. The more beautiful the woman (and therefore the more necessary it is to find something other than her looks to be interested in), the less she will be used to using anything else. This was one of our more frustrating discoveries over the past 13 years while developing this model.

The solution we've found is to "help" a woman attract you. We have a ton of tactics for this that we go over in our live programs, but one easy-to-use tactic to get you started is called "Bait-Hook-Reel-Release".

BAIT: Here we use universal, general questions or hoops to "bait" her into saying something that you interpret as being an attractive quality. It's like giving her a test where she'll win every time. For example, asking someone "what would you want to be if you could do anything you wanted?" is a good "bait" question, since everyone will have an answer to this and you can arbitrarily interpret her answer as being very positive.

HOOK: Let's say that she'd want to be an actress. That's the hook. You will treat her answer here as a reason why you are attracted to her.

REEL: Now we reel her in with something like "No way! You want to be an actress? That's awesome! I really respect people who have the balls to get on stage and perform for others. You know, your first impression kind of sucked; but now that I've gotten to know you, I think you're incredible."

RELEASE: After we reel her in, complimenting her, she will feel uncomfortable if you do not "release". This is the final part of the qualification. You do this by slightly disqualifying her. Continuing with our example, you might say something like "You are trouble for me, now that I know that about you. You're amazing. I can't even talk to you." And then start to turn or move away. Done correctly, and naturally (it will come off as fake the first few times you try it, don't worry, keep practicing), she will chase after you like you've never seen. In our workshops guys who have never gotten hit on by women in their lives get this glow in their eyes when, all of sudden, attractive women are pursuing them.

You may need to go through this process a couple of times with different qualities to fully accomplish A3: Qualification. Make her qualify herself based on more than one good quality that she has. Try not to make it blatantly obvious; weave the bait-hook-reel-release module into natural, normal, conversation. And don't forget the "release" step -- that's where a lot of guys make mistakes.

Once you've gone through the process, you've done the whole ATTRACTION module. Next, you'll be ready to move into Comfort. This is a lot easier, and we'll cover it in the next issue.

AMAZING NEWS!

The Magic Bullets e-book has been released, going for $68. Apparently I've heard from insiders that it literally tells you EVERYTHING. Step-by-step stuff that amateurs can master. Awesome!

(You can download a sample chapter at the website)

A Trick Most Men Never Think Of Using When Approaching Women

I was in my marketing class today. You see I’m in college. Yes, hot women are everywhere. Yet, so many guys go through college without getting laid.

Why not?

Simple.

They don’t know how to approach women properly.

So what do most do about it?

They mope around their apartment and complain about how all the women out there are shallow and “sluts”, and how they’re not into them.

We’ll, we know that’s a lie.

So what do aspiring guys like us do when we’re faced with these problems?

We learn good techniques.

So…

To approach women successfully, you need great ‘openers’.

If you’ve never heard of an ‘opener’ you need serious help. Skip my end comments, and click immediately! (I’m not joking)

However, my topic today is not on ‘openers’. I wanted to chat today about ‘time constraints’ and their importance.

Time constraints sounds boring as hell, huh?

We’ll, it’s actually the one thing that will revolutionize your game just as much as getting a 13-inch penis implant will.

The Art of Approaching book puts it this way…

“A Time Constraint is a way of telling your target that you are going to interact with them for a short period of time. What this does is bypass that resistance they would put up because you are presenting yourself as just a momentary distraction to their daily lives.

But this gives you the opportunity to capture their fancy and open them successfully.
Some examples of Time Constraints are:

1. Real quick…
2. I’ve only got a few seconds…
3. I know you’re busy, but…”

What do you immediately think when someone starts to talk to you?

When are they going to leave…

Imagine how a beautiful woman who gets approached twenty or thirty times a night must feel?

WHEN IS HE GOING TO LEAVE!

So the ‘time-constraint’ is a beautiful way to by-pass their defensive mechanisms and enables you to talk longer. Isn’t it funny how counter-intuitive things work best with attractive women?

Some more great examples of ‘time-constraints’:

“I’ve got to get back to my friends real quick but…”
“I gotta get back to my food but…”
“My friend from out of town is waiting over there for me, but…”

See what’s going on here?

Nice.

Guess what? It works wonders.

For detailed and other mind freaking examples of incorporating these and more ‘time-constraints’ into your ‘openers’ check out Thundercat’s amazing tactical guide for approaching women. It’s called Art of Approaching and you can check it out below.

Art of Approaching ebook Link

I wish you great success with women,

Donovan

How To Be A Nice Guy (And Still Get Women!)

Have you ever heard that old familiar lament:

"Nice Guys Finish Last, Jerks Get Laid?"

At first glance, it would seem that is true.

There are a lot of Jerks out there who are able to attract tons and tons of women.

And there are a lot of Nice Guys who struggle with getting girls, and feel frustrated.

After all, who wants to have to be a jerk in order to get women?

Here's the thing...

YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE A JERK TO GET WOMEN!

You just have to change a few things you tend to be "nice" about.

For instance:

1. Social Restrictions

We tend to believe that there are "acceptable" and "unacceptable" things to do around women.

And while this is true to some extent, Nice Guys are often wrong about the limits of what is acceptable.

Like being sexual around women. Many Nice Guys believe this is "inappropriate behavior."

But that's wrong!

Being sexual around a woman is a very powerful way of communicating your interest in her.

Little things like flirting and joking about sex can go a long way into making you a potential lover instead of just a potential "friend."

2. Inability To Act

Too often, "Nice Guys" wait around for the girl to make the first move to initiate romance.

This is a DEADLY mistake!

Women take their cues from the men they're with. If you want to escalate into a physical relationship, you have to be the one to make the first move.

This can be scary. It's possible to get rejected.

But if you don't do it, you won't succeed!

Actions speak louder than words, and if you allow yourself to act and go in for a kiss, or not be afraid to touch her, then you communicate all the right things...

Things like aggressiveness, confidence, and sexuality -- all things women find irresistibly attractive!

3. Diarrhea Of The Mouth

Way too many Nice Guys like to talk about boring stuff.

They do nothing to captivate the girl. Their stories don't inspire romance or attraction.

In short: Nice Guys are neutered!

The real trick with women is to be playful! Have fun with them!

Crack jokes.

Tease them.

Have a good time.

Show her a little bit of attention instead of focusing on yourself -- but don't take yourself for granted either!

If you just talk, and talk, and talk without knowing what you're saying, you're going to bore the girl you're with.

And girls who are bored with you will not be attracted to you.

If you look at the three points above, you can see that the Jerks who get all the women do these things.

BUT, Nice guys can do them too, and not have to act like a complete horses ass to do them!

You can still be the Nice Guy you've always been, but just change three simple tactics and see a drastic improvement in your success with women.

Here's a recent success story I got from a Nice Guy who followed my advice...

NICE GUY SUCCESS STORY>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Dude, your stuff works!

I went out last night and took the lead much more. Also, thinking of what you told me, I pressed forward on every sexual innuendo opening that popped up. It is amazing how quickly girls opened up.

I ended up talking to this guy and the two girls with him about hotel porn and the fact that everybody, including women watches it (something I'd never thought I'd talk to women about before).

We talked about Michael Ninn and porn with real storylines and started dreaming up porn careers for ourselves.

Anyway, long story short, when they closed the club we ended up at his place nearby; nice and big with a Japanese garden.

We joked around and the girls did stupid dances to the indian electronica that was playing and eventually at like four am we paired off.

I just got back!

That is the quickest result I have had yet and it was fun to be so open. Thanks!

R. (recovering Nice Guy)

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

If you want to have really effective successes and turn your luck around, you really need to read my book The Art Of Approaching.

This information is truly LETHAL stuff.

The Nice Guy above emailed me a few times about his problems, and I gave him the EXACT SAME information I just gave you.

And look what it got him!

Listen to Uncle Joseph, I don't steer you wrong!

If you don't start applying the strategies in my book, you'll have to be happy with what you're getting right now.

But if you can imagine going out to meet women armed with the "secret weapons" I give you that can help boost your confidence and get beautiful girl after beautiful girl to date you...

Well, I'm sure you're starting to realize the possibilities. =)

To download your book right now, click on the link below:

Click Here To Download Your Copy

Start enjoying real success with women right now.

Good luck!

Joseph Matthews

How To Get Loads Of Digits!

I hope you had a great night on dates, or out meeting new women over the weekend.

This will be a short one, but I have a technique that will get you more numbers than you can handle. Interested?

I used an technique that I wanted to pass on to you all. I know that I try to get every technique that can make my game jump to the next level. So here it is.

I call this the "Cell phone grab" which I have heard from somewhere else, but I'm not to sure where.

It goes like this...

Man: "Give me your cell phone" (Putting out your hand)
Woman: (Gives you the cell phone)
Man: (Type in your phone number, and click SEND)
Man: *Phone Rings* (Hang your phone up) Thanks, I'll give you a call sometime.
Woman: Ok, cool.
Man: I got some stuff I gotta get done. Talk to you later.

The key to this technique is confidence.

Confidence that she will agree with everything you're doing. If you have the slightest doubt, they will freak out. I did this EXACT technique last night actually.

I visited some social hot spots last night, and nothing was really going down. Yes, one of those nights.

I came back to my mates condo, and his two roommates were cuddling with two hotties on two different lovesacs, with a movie playing. The light's were off.

We came in and said a brief "Hi", and then sat down on the couch.

Then...

I looked over at this Californian girl sitting to the right of me. I said, "Can I see your cell phone?" and she said, "Sure."

I called my phone (to get her number), then I text messaged her from my phone, "Nice to meet you, let's hang out sometime. - Donovan"

I said, "Look you got a message!" (Showing the phone to her, illuminating the WHOLE room)

She said, "Huh?" (It didn't click at all!!)

I was thinking, you retard Donovan, you screwed that up.

So I cut my losses and said Goodbye to everyone and walked over to some girls in a few condo's over.

To my surprise, as I was talking to some other girls I get a text message saying: "Hey sorry I didn't get that. I swear I'm not always that slow! Have a good night!"

"Ohhh yeah! I'm the man" I thought to myself.

I think the underlying principle with this is confidence. Confidence to live in your own reality and not care what a woman thinks of you. That's the golden rule for attracting beautiful women.

How To Be The Man Women Love

I want to share an observation with you.

Have you ever noticed that too often, men are willing to go against what they think, feel, and believe because there is a woman available to them?

And the thing is, the men KNOW that what they're doing is going to turn out badly, but they do it anyhow because they want to be with a girl in some way.

By the same token, many men are willing to let the women they're with walk all over them and treat them like crap because they're getting sex out of the deal (if they're lucky, anyway).

Us boys have a name for this behavior.

It's called being "whipped."

We've all had a friend at one time or another who's suffered from this condition. He's a cool guy, a good friend, but suddenly he meets a woman and he can't go out drinking because he's gotta pick her car up from the shop or take her kid out to the park, or whatever task she has assigned him.

And it's not the fact that she needs him to do things for her, it's the fact that he gives up any sense of what his life was in order to please her.

The problem that comes from this situation is that the guy often not only loses the respect of his friends, but also the respect of the woman he's with. The very person he's trying hardest to please begins to resent him and take him for granted.

This is why having rules and standards is important.

It comes down to a matter of SELF RESPECT.

People who have no code, no rules by which they live their lives, no standards by which they hold themselves up to, are weak people. They look for others to give them an identity, to give them a purpose.

But having rules and standards allows you to define who you are and stand on your own two feet. People who know what they are, and are not willing to do, garner respect from others.

Most unhealthy relationships stem from the problem of weakness in one of the partners.

Typically, women want a dominant man in a relationship. And when I say dominant, I DON'T mean the ball-gag, chains, and leather whips kind-of dominant. I mean a guy who takes control of the relationship and is a source of strength for the woman he's with. A man who makes her feel safe and eliminates uncertainty from her life.

But the woman aside, it's more about making YOU happy. It's about having respect for yourself and what you want out of life.

If you have a certain type of woman you want to be with, don't lower your standards just to get laid or whatever. That's not respecting yourself. Go after the type of woman you want instead
of settling for what you can easily get.

You'll be happier that way.

If you have a rule where you don't want to date single moms because you don't want to take care of someone else's kids - or whatever your reason may be - then don't do it! If you meet a girl, but she's a single mom, stay true to your rule. There's a reason you made it a rule in the first place, right?

In the end, having rules and standards makes you a more attractive person, because it conveys confidence and conviction, two traits women always find attractive in a man.

And as you know, women are complicated beings, and it seems most men are clueless when it comes to dealing with them!

So let me ask you this...

If you have more questions about how to be successful in your lovelife, what would it be like to have all those questions answered and enjoy attracting the incredible women you've always
dreamed of?

Maybe there's a girl you want to meet?

Maybe there's a girl you want to take out on a date?

Maybe there's a girl you just want to sleep with?

But how do you DO all this with the women you want?

Well fear not, my friend. Because answers are here. And with answers, come hope.

Listen, we all know what it's like to struggle with women. Sometimes you're too afraid to meet them because you don't want to be rejected. Sometimes, you're afraid to ask them out because you don't know what to do on the date. And sometimes, you might even be afraid to "close the deal" because you don't know what to do in the bedroom!

All of your problems can be solved with one thing and one thing only...

Knowledge.

Knowledge and the will to apply it!

In my time learning to be successful with women, I've gotten to meet some of the best dating experts in the world! And they've taught me some amazing secrets to their success with the fairer sex.

But after a seeing how incredible this information was they were sharing with me, I started to feel guilty.

Guilty that I was privy to all this fantastic advice, and no one else was!

Can you imagine what it would be like to get EXPERT advice from EXPERIENCED ladies men who KNOW what they're talking about?

What would it feel like if you could walk up to any woman you want, without fear, and easily strike up a conversation with her?

What would it feel like if you could go out on a date, confident that it was going to end the way YOU wanted it to?

What would it feel like to be so amazing in the bedroom, you've literally got women BEATING DOWN YOUR DOOR to be your willing love slave again and again?

When you literally FEEL that kind of confidence around women, you won't even have to work at getting them! They'll be the ones trying to get YOU.

That's not a lie my friend, nor is it marketing BS. That's the truth.

The great thing is that you CAN feel that way. You can walk through life powerfully, without fear of rejection, enjoying success with beautiful women, despite your looks, social standing, or bank account.

It is possible, if you're willing to learn.

I have accumulated some amazing advice from the best seducers, dating experts, and don juans in the world, and I've made it all available to the common man.

But it's not for everyone.

Some guys just aren't ready to learn these secrets. They just simply aren't ready for them yet.

If you're afraid of hard work, are lazy, or don't want to change how your life is currently like, then take the information you recieved from my newsletters and happily store it away on your computer.

But if you're committed to changing what doesn't work, if you really, truly want to have that feeling of a supremely confident ladies man and carry that with you wherever you go, then you definitely need to check out my website by clicking below:

Art of Approaching Website

Here you will discover everything you need to change your life for the better!

Good luck, my friend.

Joseph Matthews

Giving an Effective Massage (Made Easy)

Everyone knows to amplify attraction is essential to seduction.

Well... one of the best ways to get from non-touching to touching, then intimacy is a good massage. I found this informative article on good technique with massaging on alt.seduction.

Try a few things from it, sometimes its not appropriate to use oil (maybe after a date), but experiment.

Here it is:

Start with conversation. Without even touching the person, talk to them. Get attuned to how they're feeling etc at the time of the massage. Find out how their day, week, month has been (Depending onhow often you talk to them. =) Ask them if there are any areas that are painful or sensitive that they'd like avoided or paid special attention to. Remember that if they're not comfortable with you, they won't be comfortable with the massage they're receiving from you. Ask them if they would be uncomfortable with taking their clothes off. Let them know that you won't see them completely nude, but the purpose of the removal of clothing is so that lotions or oils can be used and so that the friction between cloth and skin won't cause discomfort for either the masseur/masseuse or massee. If they're uncomfortable with taking off their clothes, let them know that it's okay to leave them on. Again, they have to be comfortable in order to enjoy the massage. If they do wear clothes, don't use lotins or oils, but instead decide (Depending on the type of clothing) if you're going to cause the friction between your skin and the cloth or the massee's skin and cloth. If the clothing is very loose, you're best to keep the cloth with your hand. If the clothing is tight, it's best to keep it with the skin of the massee.

Assuming that not everyone has a massage table available, the floor is the next best thing (In some cases, it's better, IMO). Lay out an exercise mat or similar pad if you have it. If not, a blanket or comforter will work fine. Make sure that the surface that the person is lying on won't hurt their skin. (Don't use a rough feeling blanket... The smoother, the better.) Make sure that there's room enough for the person to stretch out on and spread their arms and legs out a little on without falling off the edge. Tell the person that after you leave the room, you want them to take off their clothing and lie on their stomach on the matt, covering their butt with a towel.

Have another towel handy to cover the breasts of a female massee when she turns over. When they're lying on the floor properly covered, they should call you back into the room to begin the massage. You should have a natural oil or lotion ready. If possible, have a warm water bath that you keep the bottle in (A bowl of warm water works good). You'll want to use an organic oil or lotion rather than an animal fat-based oil or a mineral oil. These can harm some people's skins. Vegetable oils and lotions work best. Personally, I use a Keoki Papaya Aloe Lanolin lotion. You can usually find a good natural lotion or oil at GNC or any health store.

Start by rubbing the lotion between both hands to warm it up if it isn't already warm. Gently spread it across the upper back and shoulders, getting the massee used to your touch.

IMPORTANT: Once you have touched the person, never lose touch til you're done. You want to create a bonded feeling between you and your friend through touch and if you break contact, that feeling is ruined. Keep talking to the person while you spread the lotion across the upper back and shoulders. Spread the lotion in a circular motion of each hand for a few rotations, gradually moving your hands to the shoulders, cupping the hands over the tops of the shoulders, pulling down on the muscles between the neck and shoulder joints with your four fingers and
pushing up with the thumbs on the same muscles, pushing up along the back of the neck muscles. Use circular motions with the thumbs along this area while gently pulling these muscles with the fingers. Move the hands down the shoulders, pulling on the muscles with fingers and pushing with the thumbs.

IMPORTANT: Don't push on the spine! Keep the hands on either side of the spine, working down along the muscles.

Work your way back up the back with both hands cupped to the sides of the back, thumbs along either side of the spine. Pull out from the spine with the thumbs, working back to the top of the back. Return to the shoulders, again cupping the hands over the shoulders and pulling with your four fingers and pushing with the thumbs. Starting at the top of the back pull down along either side of the spine with the four fingers, pushing down with some force, being careful not to hurt the massee. Work back up the back and use both hands on each shoulder, switching from side to side. Repeat the above as nescessary.

When you get bored working on the back [kidding] move gently down the sides to the legs. Rub gently down to the ankles. Cup both hands over one ankle, moving your body around to one side of the feet. Holding both hands over the ankle, knead the legs by pulling up on one side of the leg with the thumb of one hand while pulling back with the fingers of the other hand, keeping both hands next to each other.

Move back and forth like this with both hands up and down the calf of the leg. Rotate the hands ninety degrees so that both thumbs are in the middle of the knee and the fingers are cuppping over to the sides of the thigh. Pull away from the center of the leg with the thumbs, using the fingers as leverage (but not pressing too hard so as to hurt the person). Work up and down the thigh pulling out from the center with both hands. When you reach the top of the thigh, pull down the center of the leg til you reach the bottom of the thigh and start working back up. Work back down to the ankle and swithch legs. Repeat on the other leg. Work back up the thigh to the back, cupping the hands over both thighs with the thumbs off center to the outside of the leg, pressing with the fingers. As you move your hands up, your thumbs will rub along the buttocks and the fingers along the sides. You will be cupping each hand on the side of the lower back of the massee. Work up the back repeating what you worked on before.

Move down the arms, gently rubbing lengthwise. Work back to the back and rub the neck. Rub the fingers up into the scalp, moving back and forth with all your fingers as if scratching, but without the nails of your hands. Show the person the other towel and move your body around, placing yourself above their head. Have them turn over, keeping your hands on their head. Move down their arms, rub the fronts of the legs in a similar way as to the backs of the legs, and rub the feet, if you have the knowledge. Unfortunately, it takes a lot of explanation to properly describe a foot massage, but as long as you're careful, you can't hurt the person, so experiment.

In order to maintain contact, you'll have to apply the oil or lotion with one hand, out have to warm it before you apply it. To do this, use one hand to pick up the bottle and squeeze some oil or lotion into the nape of the opposite hand, then rub the hand that held the bottle ove the nape to warm the oil, gently working the oil onto the skin. Just remember that you're free to experiment with these different techniques and don't have to follow this description exactly.

This is a great technique for kino escalation. Because when you're done: simply start holding her hand. Then you can escalate into kissing, sex, etc. She will be so relaxed that pretty much anything will go. Plus you've already touched her everywhere.

How To Ask A Girl Out

I have been getting a FLOOD of emails from avid readers of the blog. The most common question that most ask is "Whats the best way to ask a girl out for a date?" or "What is the best cocky and funny way to ask a girl out for a date?" or the funniest "How should I ask her out so I have the best chances of getting laid that night?"

Haha classic.

Anyways, David D wrote something about this that couldn't be put better. Check it out here.

Donovan

P.S. I love getting emails, they lighten up my day, please keep sending me your questions!